Manga One Piece

The Paramount Booty Call


Make love, stop war. What’s Red-Haired Shanks real movitation for stopping the Paramount War?

We all know Shanks is a laid back guy. The main reason he’s so popular with other pirates is because he has the best weed, allegedly. He loves to party and he loves the ladies, well, loves the Makino. So, why did Captain Party decide to stop the Paramount War between Team Edward and Team Sengoku? Answer: Ass.

Let’s look at his first appearance all the way in chapter one. He spent months at Foosha Village on business. Business? Riiiiiight. What business does Shanks have in East Blue? Taking his crew to strip clubs and bowling alleys, that’s what! But, that’s for his crew. I’m thinking he just wanted to spend time with his Makino but left to do “business” to keep his crew happy. Sly dog.

Fast forward ten years with our roguish captain horny as hell, looking for ANY excuse to get back to Foosha Village and tap that bar maiden backside. What’s this? A war at Marine HQ? This is it! His chance finally arrives!

Shanks conveniently arrives in the nick of time to end the war, knowing he could have joined up with Whitebeard in the beginning. He even meet with Whitebeard before the war! Dude couldn’t suggest they team-up for shits and giggles? Course not! He had to be the big hero to impress his girl. Bros before hoes, my friend. Whitebeard is dead because you didn’t follow ye Pirate Bro Code.

The Funeral set him back a few days but mission accomplished. Saved Whitebeard’s crew and now sadden by his death he has more than enough reason to visit Makino for a double dose of hero/grief lovin’.

makino baby

Uh-oh! Someone didn’t use a Luffy! Time to haul ass back to the New World!